Tuesday, April 29, 2008

When I feel frustrated?

  1. When people around me prove that stupidity is not only occurring occasionally but also being universally accepted.
  2. When a person acts and pretends that the world and creatures therein are mirror reflections of him/her and any deviation is automatically dubbed as erroneous and unsolicited.
  3. When no matter how hard I try to hammer certain rather simple concept or idea into the head of certain people and no matter how much they waive their heads and act affirmatively as if they understood perfectly what was required and expected from them, the results are undoubtfully the same – rather their absence.
  4. When arrogance and ignorance synthesize in such a way as to create a resonance of human irrationality and pettiness, any level of which will not only tend to be toxic but also mortally lethal.
  5. When any rational and explainable behavior is taken to a ride and considered unacceptable just because it is not a corresponding to a norm in that country, group or society.
  6. When ideals, words, actions and intentions of people look very much like four arrows of a compass.
  7. When I see people who wore rosy glasses instilling change, equality and prosperity of human societies and when they don’t realize and thereafter recognize the large disconnect between the world of dreams and reality.
  8. When people tell “I want to make a difference.”
  9. When people evoke methods of Martin Luther King and Mohandas Gandhi as universal rules of achieving drastic change rather then exceptional happenstances.
  10. When people think they really know much when all they know is that they think they know much.
  11. When touching sensible topics (on religions, human rights, etc.) during social outings arouses not only prudence and cultural sensitivity in person but also utter disgust (in the worst case) or polite indifference (in the best case).
  12. When hypocrisy is so flagrant that one feels like closing one’s eyes in order to avoid notice – unfortunately it never helps.

Monday, April 28, 2008

How the world conspires for or against us?

What is that I was thinking when I logged into my Blogger this time?

By the time I got to this page where I am typing now, I already have forgotten.

This was one of those days when I had my head spinning through the very same and by now banal questions of life and death, change and constancy, intervention and laissez-faire. Same old lines of thought, same old conclusions.

But there was something new that has been buzzing in the corner of my mind for some time now. How much is each individual influenced by thoughts of others about him/her. Did you ever ask yourself, how certain days are good and certain days are bad, be it in our daily or long term accomplishments, relationships, state of mind, etc.

Is each day random? How is the fact that people have me in their thoughts and dreams influencing me? Does it at all? I believe it does.

There are days when many people call me. There are many days when I get much positive input from independent parties. There are many days when I succeed in everything I try myself in. My daily interactions are as varied as they possibly can. There is no correlation, no overlap, no preliminary agreement or accord. But things happen in concert – directing us towards one way or another. Of course, opposite – overall bad or negative days – are totally common place as well.

How is it possible? How so many independent things, occurrences, people, events come together and start acting at one time in one place and on one person in a very concerted way? Think about it and remember that even the most unconceivable of things might and perhaps are possible.

One day perhaps cognitive sciences will come close to answering these and other questions, which many people dismiss as inappropriate due to lack of choice and information.

Think about it..

Sunday, April 27, 2008

An occurence during Cairo night or perhaps morning.

I woke up. It was 3am. I was being to a ride my mosquitoes and alike. I tried to cuddle up in my bed. Right, then left, then centre, then centre-right. Nothing worked. I couldn’t fall back asleep. I closed my eyes and drifted off for awhile, before being abruptly awaken from my light slumber by a shrieky laughter that erupted for few seconds right in front of my door, which was left half-open by a breeze passing through.

I sat up, looked at my watch. 4:03am. The laughter was gone, so was its source. But I was awake, and I felt utterly thirsty – thirsty to the point that this time when I lay down again, my thoughts became pre-occupied with how dire was the need to quench my thirst. Somehow – I still don’t know how – I managed to nap for another 15 mins, during which time I had this passing, light-headed dreamlike imagery in my mind, which gave an impression that I was in some kind of a cell, struggling for water and was unable to get it. This dream or whatever you might call it, has exacerbated even further my need for a liquid. I went out of my room.

4am, Hotel Dahab, Downtown Cairo. Going out of my room, I came across a few acquaintances – foreigners – I have in the hotel – all of them looking as if it was a perfect time of the day to walk around with books in hands and do some intellectually challenging work. One of them addressed me with “Good morning, or good night – not sure which one applies to you because one never knows when you come and go.” It brought a smile to my face and a realization to my mind. Realization that the unpredictability and intensiveness of my working days as well as my hotel-in hotel-out schedule brought much air of mystery and blur around my persona and work.

Further ahead, at the reception of the hostel, I saw another four familiar faces. This time, all locals, Egyptians, some working in the hostel and some of their friends, permanently at the hostel, dwelling on the Internet and entertaining themselves and hostel guests. They all looked shining and fresh, again leaving a somewhat misleading impression that this was a perfectly normal time of the day to be awake, smiling and making noisy and funny conversations.

They invited me to sit with them. I told I had to go get water and then I would join them. Being polite – in terms of social etiquette and politeness in particular, I would rank Egypt among the lowest of all the countries I have heard of or been to – I asked whether they wanted something to drink. They did. I went downstairs, being told in advance that the 24-hour shop was closed – what the heck. In vicinity, there was only one kiosk open, but it wasn’t the few minutes I spent walking towards it, which enchanted me. It was the fact that I saw Cairo, for the first time in eight month, rather empty. Emptiness, serenity, calm – words that appeared to me then. I felt like sitting in the middle of a rather large street, totally devoid of its usual traffic, and meditating. I couldn’t. My physiological needs prevailed – cheers Maslow.

I bought water and Pepsi. I came back and found my Egyptian friends in the same good mood I left them in. I made them even happier with what I bought for them. I then came back to my room, after inquiring at what time the sunrise was supposed to be – around 6am I was told and being on top of the building, 8th floor, would make it a spectacular view.

I finished the Pepsi can in quick gulps. I then started the water bottle but was unable to se its bottom. Now what? I realized I wanted to write about this rather insignificant, banal, daily occurrence that many other perhaps experience throughout their weeks and months in many other parts of the world. A normal thing. Wake up in the middle of night and do something. I nonetheless wanted to write.

I turned on my computer. I discovered very recently a very impressive Web2.0 site, having same objective but thousand-fold better in design, style, quality and functionality than Youtube – Grooveshark. I turned it on, putting few songs into my playlist – “Is It You” by Cassie Ventura (from Step Up 2), “Bleed It Out” by Linkin Park, “Girlfriend” by Avril Lavigne and started writing. And here I am at the end of what I intended to write.

Have a good night Cairo, or rather good morning! It is impossible to say which. Cairo is a city, which never sleeps, and so are those who live and blend into its ambiance, body, spirit.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Some Interesting Facts About Iceland

  • Most Icelanders do not have a family name (such as Johnson, Smith, etc). So children have a given name and then father’s-name-son or father’s-name-daughter. Thus:
    1. Jon has a son named Thor Jonsson and a daughter named Hafdis Jonsdottir.
    2. Thor Jonsson has a son named Bjarni Thorsson and a daughter named Frida Thorsdottir.
    3. And so forth.
  • Icelandic women don’t take the husband’s name when they marry, chiefly because the husband doesn’t have a family name to take.
  • Because they don’t have surnames, Icelanders are listed in the telephone directory alphabetically by first name.
  • Because they don’t have surnames, it is not appropriate to call an Icelander by Mr. or Ms. Almost all Icelanders use the first name with everyone—including the president of Iceland.
  • The English word geyser comes from Icelandic (perhaps the only Icelandic word imported into English). Geysir is the name of a famous geyser in Iceland (which, sadly, no longer erupts).
  • The Icelanders speak the Icelandic language, which is used only in Iceland and among Icelandic expatriates—chiefly in Scandinavia and North America. Icelandic is very similar to old Norwegian of about 1,000 years ago.
  • There are only about 270,000 Icelanders in the country. About half of them live in the capital Reykjavik and its suburbs.
  • Iceland is the world’s oldest democracy. Its parliament (Althingi) was founded about 1,000 years ago.
  • Iceland has vast amounts of water—because it rains so much. Icelandic water is so clean and pure that it is piped into the city and to the kitchen taps in the home without any treatment (no chlorination needed).
  • Urban Icelandic homes do not need a water heater or a furnace for heating. Steam and hot water are piped into the city from natural geysers and hot springs for use in homes and buildings.
  • Because of its bountiful water supply and many rivers, Iceland has vast reserves of hydroelectric power. Electricity is so inexpensive that aluminum ore (bauxite) is shipped in to the country, made into aluminum, and the aluminum ingots are shipped out again. (Smelting aluminum requires vast amounts of electricity.)
  • The weather in Iceland is not as cold as you might think. (Winter is a heck of a lot colder in Minnesota than it is in Iceland!) The climate is relatively mild because of the influence of the Atlantic Ocean’s Gulf Stream. Average winter daytime temperature in Reykjavik is 31 degrees F. (−1 degrees C.)
  • Iceland is very green, because there is so much water and the climate is mild. (There are not many trees however.) People like to say that Iceland should be named Greenland and Greenland should be named Iceland. I used to tell my Icelandic friends that they should change the name of their country from Iceland to Waterland.
  • Iceland lies just south of the Arctic Circle. Winter nights and summer days are long. On December 21 in the capital, the sun rises at 11:30 a.m. and sets at 3:30 p.m. On June 21 the sun sets about midnight and rises at 3:00 a.m. It never gets darker than twilight at night during the late spring and early summer.
  • During a recent survey, Icelanders ranked the highest of all European countries in expressing general satisfaction with their lives.
  • Icelanders rank near the top of world nations in the per capita rate of connection to the Internet.
  • Iceland has no army, navy, or air force. It does have a Coast Guard.

Top 100 Project Gutenberg EBooks 24.04.2008

Top 100 EBooks 24.04.2008

  1. The Outline of Science, Vol. 1 (of 4) by J. Arthur Thomson (1516)
  2. Manual of Surgery Volume First: General Surgery. Sixth Edition. by Miles and Thomson (909)
  3. Manners, Custom and Dress During the Middle Ages and During the Renaissance Period by Paul Lacroix (803)
  4. History of the United States by Charles A. Beard and Mary Ritter Beard (652)
  5. Little Journeys to the Homes of the Great - Volume 01 by Elbert Hubbard (574)
  6. Searchlights on Health by B. G. Jefferis and J. L. Nichols (556)
  7. Illustrated History of Furniture by Frederick Litchfield (540)
  8. Our Day by William Ambrose Spicer (503)
  9. The People's Common Sense Medical Adviser in Plain English by Ray Vaughn Pierce (423)
  10. A Text-Book of the History of Painting by John Charles Van Dyke (381)
  11. Woman as Decoration by Emily Burbank (378)
  12. Myths and Legends of Ancient Greece and Rome by E.M. Berens (343)
  13. Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete by Various (295)
  14. Across Unknown South America by A. Henry Savage Landor (289)
  15. The Mafulu by Robert Wood Williamson (289)
  16. Encyclopaedia Britannica, 11th Edition, Volume 4, Part 3 by Various (283)
  17. The Practice and Science of Drawing by Harold Speed (281)
  18. Elements of Structural and Systematic Botany by Douglas Houghton Campbell (281)
  19. Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen (275)
  20. In the Forbidden Land by A. Henry Savage Landor (265)
  21. A Book of Natural History by Various (245)
  22. Amusements in Mathematics by Henry Ernest Dudeney (243)
  23. Mexico by Charles Reginald Enock (242)
  24. General Science by Bertha M. Clark (240)
  25. The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain (226)
  26. Gov. Bob. Taylor's Tales by Robert L. Taylor (223)
  27. Myths and Legends of All Nations by Various (218)
  28. Handwork in Wood by William Noyes (217)
  29. Kamasutra by Vatsyayana (214)
  30. Custom and Myth by Andrew Lang (214)
  31. The Child's Day by Woods Hutchinson (211)
  32. Integration of the Armed Forces, 1940-1965 by Morris J. MacGregor (210)
  33. New Discoveries at Jamestown by John L. Cotter and J. Paul Hudson (204)
  34. Discoverers and Explorers by Edward R. Shaw (202)
  35. Across Coveted Lands by A. Henry Savage Landor (199)
  36. Beowulf (192)
  37. Round-about Rambles in Lands of Fact and Fancy by Frank Richard Stockton (189)
  38. Ulysses by James Joyce (189)
  39. Letters and Lettering by Frank Chouteau Brown (187)
  40. The Bontoc Igorot by Albert Ernest Jenks (182)
  41. The Iliad by Homer (177)
  42. A Smaller History of Rome by Eugene Lawrence and Sir William Smith (173)
  43. Women in the fine arts, from the Seventh Century B.C. to the Twentieth Century A.D. by Waters (169)
  44. Vocational Guidance for Girls by Marguerite Stockman Dickson (166)
  45. The World's Best Poetry, Volume 3 by Various (164)
The rest will be found on Gutenberg Project's website.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Why I Left Greenpeace

By PATRICK MOORE
April 22, 2008

In 1971 an environmental and antiwar ethic was taking root in Canada, and I chose to participate. As I completed a Ph.D. in ecology, I combined my science background with the strong media skills of my colleagues. In keeping with our pacifist views, we started Greenpeace.

But I later learned that the environmental movement is not always guided by science. As we celebrate Earth Day today, this is a good lesson to keep in mind.

At first, many of the causes we championed, such as opposition to nuclear testing and protection of whales, stemmed from our scientific knowledge of nuclear physics and marine biology. But after six years as one of five directors of Greenpeace International, I observed that none of my fellow directors had any formal science education. They were either political activists or environmental entrepreneurs. Ultimately, a trend toward abandoning scientific objectivity in favor of political agendas forced me to leave Greenpeace in 1986.

The breaking point was a Greenpeace decision to support a world-wide ban on chlorine. Science shows that adding chlorine to drinking water was the biggest advance in the history of public health, virtually eradicating water-borne diseases such as cholera. And the majority of our pharmaceuticals are based on chlorine chemistry. Simply put, chlorine is essential for our health.

My former colleagues ignored science and supported the ban, forcing my departure. Despite science concluding no known health risks – and ample benefits – from chlorine in drinking water, Greenpeace and other environmental groups have opposed its use for more than 20 years.

Opposition to the use of chemicals such as chlorine is part of a broader hostility to the use of industrial chemicals. Rachel Carson's 1962 book, "Silent Spring," had a significant impact on many pioneers of the green movement. The book raised concerns, many rooted in science, about the risks and negative environmental impact associated with the overuse of chemicals. But the initial healthy skepticism hardened into a mindset that treats virtually all industrial use of chemicals with suspicion.

Sadly, Greenpeace has evolved into an organization of extremism and politically motivated agendas. Its antichlorination campaign failed, only to be followed by a campaign against polyvinyl chloride.

Greenpeace now has a new target called phthalates (pronounced thal-ates). These are chemical compounds that make plastics flexible. They are found in everything from hospital equipment such as IV bags and tubes, to children's toys and shower curtains. They are among the most practical chemical compounds in existence.

Phthalates are the new bogeyman. These chemicals make easy targets since they are hard to understand and difficult to pronounce. Commonly used phthalates, such as diisononyl phthalate (DINP), have been used in everyday products for decades with no evidence of human harm. DINP is the primary plasticizer used in toys. It has been tested by multiple government and independent evaluators, and found to be safe.

Despite this, a political campaign that rejects science is pressuring companies and the public to reject the use of DINP. Retailers such as Wal-Mart and Toys "R" Us are switching to phthalate-free products to avoid public pressure.

It may be tempting to take this path of least resistance, but at what cost? None of the potential replacement chemicals have been tested and found safe to the degree that DINP has. The Consumer Product Safety Commission recently cautioned, "If DINP is to be replaced in children's products . . . the potential risks of substitutes must be considered. Weaker or more brittle plastics might break and result in a choking hazard. Other plasticizers might not be as well studied as DINP."

The hysteria over DINP began in Europe and Israel, both of which instituted bans. Yet earlier this year, Israel realized the error of putting politics before science, and reinstated DINP.

The European Union banned the use of phthalates in toys prior to completion of a comprehensive risk assessment on DINP. That assessment ultimately concluded that the use of DINP in infant toys poses no measurable risk.

The antiphthalate activists are running a campaign of fear to implement their political agenda. They have seen success in California, with a state ban on the use of phthalates in infant products, and are pushing for a national ban. This fear campaign merely distracts the public from real environmental threats.

We all have a responsibility to be environmental stewards. But that stewardship requires that science, not political agendas, drive our public policy.

Mr. Moore, co-founder and former leader of Greenpeace, is chairman and chief scientist of Greenspirit Strategies.


Source: WSJ


The Most Horrible English Words

  1. Honorificabilitudinitatibus

    The word consists of 27 letters. This word appeared in the script of Shakespeare titled “Love's Labour's Lost”, which means “invincible glorious.”
  2. Antidisestablishmentarianism

    The word consists of 28 letters. This word means “opposition to the withdrawal of state support or recognition from an established church, esp. the Anglican Church in 19th-century England” as explained in Dictionary.com. It has been quoted once by the British Prime Minister, William Ewart Gladstone, 1809- 1898.
  3. Floccinaucihihilipilification

    The word comprises of 29 letters. It means “act or habit to deny the value of some particular things.”
  4. Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

    The word comprises of 34 letters. This word appeared in a movie called “Mary Poppins”, which means “good.”
  5. Hepaticocholecystostcholecystntenterostomy

    The word consists of 42 letters. It appears in the “Medical Dictionary” edited by Gao De as a surgical terminology, which refers to indirect artificial tube surgery between the intestine and gallbladder or in the gallbladder and bile duct.
  6. Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis

    The word comprises of 45 letters. It appears in the eighth edition of Webster dictionary, which means “pneumoconiosis disease caused by inhaling small particles of quartzite.” Miners are particularly vulnerable to this disease.
  7. Antipericatametaanaparcircum -
    volutiorectumgustpoops of the Coprofied

    The word consists of 50 letters. There is a display of one French writer's ancient story in a library shelf, with this long English word as its book title.
  8. Osseocaynisanguineovisceri -
    cartilagininervomedullary

    The word consists of 51 letters. This is a terminology related to anatomy. It appeared in a novel called “Headlong Hall” written by an English writer, 1785-1866.
  9. Aequeosalinocalcalinoceraceoa -
    luminosocupreovitriolie

    The word consists of 52 letters. This word was invented by the British Medical author, Dr. Edward Strother, 1675-1737. It is used to refer to the composition of mineral water found in England.
  10. Bababadalgharaghtakamminarronn -
    konnbronntonnerronntuonnthunntro -
    varrhounawnskawntoohoohoordenenthurnuk

    The word of consists of 100 letters. It appeared in the book titled “Finnegan wake” written by Irish author, Andean James Joyce, 1882- 1942. This word refers to the downfall of Adam and Eve.
  11. Lopadotemachoselachogaleokranio -
    leipsanodrimhypotrimmatosi -
    lphioparamelitokatakechymenokich -
    lepikossyphophattoperisteralektr -
    yonoptekephalliokigklopeleiolagoiosi -
    raiosiraiobaphetraganopterygon

    The word consists of 182 letters. This English word is derived from the Greece word, originating from the drama script of comedy titled “ecclesiazusae” written by a Greek writer, Aristophanes, 448- 385. It refers to spicy foods that cooked from the remaining vegetables and beef.
  12. This word is terribly long in its length as it comprises of 1913 letters as follow:

    Methionylglutaminylarginyltyrosy -
    lglutamylserylleucylphenylalanylalanylglutaminy -
    lleucyllysylglutamylarginyllysylglutamylglycyla -
    lanylphenylalanylvalylprolyphenylalanYlvalythre -
    onylleucylglycylaspartylprolylglycylisoleucylg -
    lutamylglutaminylsErylleucyllysylisoleucy -
    laspartylthreonylleucylIsoleucylglutamy -
    lalanylglycylalanylasparthlalanylleucylg -
    lutamylleucylglycylisoleucylprolylphenylalanylse -
    Rylaspartylprolylleucylalanylaspartylglycylp -
    RolylthreOnylisoleucylglutaminylasPfraginylal -
    anylthreonylleucylarfinylalanylphenylalanylalany -
    lalanylglycylvalythreonylprolylalanylglutaminy -
    lcysteinylphenylalanylglutamylmethionylleucy -
    lalanylleuOylisoleucylarginylglutaminy -
    llysyhistidylprolylthreonylisoleucylproly -
    lisoleucylglycylleucylmethionyltyrosylalany -
    lasparaginylleucylvalylphenylalanylasparaginy -
    llysyglycylisoleucylaspartylglutamylphenylalany -
    lthrosylalanylglutaminylcsteinylglutamyllysylva -
    lylglycylvalylaspartylserylvalylleucylvalylalny -
    laspartylvalylprolylvalylglUtaminylglutamylsery -
    lalanylprolylphenylalanylarginylglutaminylalany -
    lalanylleucylarginylhistidylasparaginyvalylalany -
    lprolylisoleucylprolylisoleucylphenylalanylisoleucy -
    lphenylalanylisoleucylcysteinylprolylprolylaspartylalany -
    laspartylaspartylaspartylleucylleucylarginy -
    lglutaminylisoleucylalanylseryltyrosylglycy -
    larginylglycyltyrosylthreonyltyrOsylleucyl -
    leucylserylarginylalanylglycylvalylthreony -
    lglycylalanylglutamYlasparainylarginylalany -
    lalanylleucylprolylleucylasparaginylhistidy -
    lleucylValylalanyllysylleucyllysylglutamy -
    ltyrosylasparaginylalanylalanylprolylpro -
    lylleucylglutaminylglgycylphenylalanylglycy -
    lisoleucylserylalanylprolylaspartylglutaminy -
    lvalyllysylalanylalanylisoleucylaspartylalany -
    lglycylalanylalanylglycylalanylisoleucylsery -
    lglycylserylalanylisoleucylvalyllysylisoIeucy -
    lisoleucylglutamylglutaminylHistidylasparaginy -
    liSoleucylglutamylprolylglutamyllysylmethionyl -
    leucylalanylalanylleucyllysylvalylphenylalanyl -
    calylglutaminylprolylmethionlysylalanylalanylt -
    hreonylarginylserine.

    The above word refers to "Tryptophan synthase a protein", a chemical name for a substance that contains 267 kinds of amino acid enzymes.


Source Writinghood

Sunday, April 20, 2008

LEXOPHILES...

  1. A bicycle can’t stand alone; it is two tired.
  2. A will is a dead giveaway.
  3. Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.
  4. A backward poet writes inverse.
  5. In a democracy it’s your vote that counts; in feudalism, it’s your Count that votes.
  6. A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.
  7. If you don’t pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.
  8. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.
  9. Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and I’ll show you A-flat miner.
  10. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.
  11. The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.
  12. A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France resulted in Linoleum Blownapart.
  13. You are stuck with your debt if you can’t budge it.
  14. Local Area Network in Australia : The LAN down under.
  15. He broke into song because he couldn’t find the key.
  16. A calendar’s days are numbered.
  17. A lot of money is tainted: ‘Taint yours, and ‘taint mine.
  18. A boiled egg is hard to beat.
  19. He had a photographic memory which was never developed.
  20. A plateau is a high form of flattery.
  21. The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison: a small medium at large.
  22. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.
  23. When you’ve seen one shopping center you’ve seen a mall.
  24. If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine.
  25. When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she’d dye.
  26. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.
  27. Santa’s helpers are subordinate clauses.
  28. Acupuncture: a jab well done.
  29. Marathon runners with bad shoes suffer the agony of de feet.

Monday, April 14, 2008

Politics Explained

FEUDALISM: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.

PURE SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. You have to take care of all of the cows. The government gives you as much milk as you need.

BUREAUCRATIC SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and put them in a barn with everyone else's cows. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and eggs as the regulations say you need.

FASCISM: You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them and sells you the milk.

PURE COMMUNISM: You have two cows. Your neighbors help you take care of them, and you all share the milk.

RUSSIAN COMMUNISM: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk.

CAMBODIAN COMMUNISM: You have two cows. The government takes both of them and shoots you.

DICTATORSHIP: You have two cows. The government takes both and drafts you.

PURE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk.

REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors pick someone to tell you who gets the milk.

BUREAUCRACY: You have two cows. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.

PURE ANARCHY: You have two cows. Either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbors try to take the cows and kill you.

LIBERTARIAN/ANARCHO-CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

SURREALISM: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.

(Original source unknown . . . this version expanded and Illuminated by SJ.)

Some of quotations of Frederick Zappone

• The way out of suffering is through it. Resist suffering and suffering increases. Acceptance, in the moment, that you are suffering will dissolve your suffering instantly.

• You are perfect in every way until you compare yourself with another.

• Your need to control things is based on the fear of things controlling you.

• What you worry about is what controls you.

• Every one of us is allowed to suffer in order that we can grow in compassion and sensitivity towards the suffering of others.

• Only people who live in fear feel the need to abuse others.

• Trying too hard is un-attractive (does not attract) and pushes away from us the very things we want.

• When you encounter obstacles or roadblocks that are between you and what you want out of life choose to be like the "wind and water" and "flow" up, over, around or under them rather than fighting them and giving them power over you.

• We become free to follow the desires of our heart when we are influenced more by our own thoughts than the thoughts of others.

• In life, we always have two choices about our circumstances; we can change our circumstances or we can change our attitude about our circumstances. Once we change our attitude, our circumstances change naturally.

• When we stop finding faults in ourselves, we will stop finding faults in others.

• God lives in the moment. If you want to find God, live there too!

• Life doesn't always go your way, don't take it personally.

• Most people are full of crap, love them anyway.

• If you care about you, others will too!

• Putting other people first all the time will put you back at the end of the line.

• Life is not difficult, it is only our thinking that makes it so..

• Find humor in your problems and they will seem smaller to you.

• Love won't solve the problems of the world but it certainly makes the ride worthwhile.

• Don't take yourself too seriously, no one else does.

100 Best First Lines from Novels

1. Call me Ishmael. —Herman Melville, Moby-Dick (1851)

2. It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife. —Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice (1813)

3. A screaming comes across the sky. —Thomas Pynchon, Gravity's Rainbow (1973)

4. Many years later, as he faced the firing squad, Colonel Aureliano Buendía was to remember that distant afternoon when his father took him to discover ice. —Gabriel García Márquez, One Hundred Years of Solitude (1967; trans. Gregory Rabassa)

5. Lolita, light of my life, fire of my loins. —Vladimir Nabokov, Lolita (1955)

6. Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way. —Leo Tolstoy, Anna Karenina (1877; trans. Constance Garnett)

7. riverrun, past Eve and Adam's, from swerve of shore to bend of bay, brings us by a commodius vicus of recirculation back to Howth Castle and Environs. —James Joyce, Finnegans Wake (1939)

8. It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. —George Orwell, 1984 (1949)

9. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair. —Charles Dickens, A Tale of Two Cities (1859)

10. I am an invisible man. —Ralph Ellison, Invisible Man (1952)

11. The Miss Lonelyhearts of the New York Post-Dispatch (Are you in trouble?—Do-you-need-advice?—Write-to-Miss-Lonelyhearts-and-she-will-help-you) sat at his desk and stared at a piece of white cardboard. —Nathanael West, Miss Lonelyhearts (1933)

12. You don't know about me without you have read a book by the name of The Adventures of Tom Sawyer; but that ain't no matter. —Mark Twain, Adventures of Huckleberry Finn (1885)

13. Someone must have slandered Josef K., for one morning, without having done anything truly wrong, he was arrested. —Franz Kafka, The Trial (1925; trans. Breon Mitchell)

14. You are about to begin reading Italo Calvino's new novel, If on a winter's night a traveler. —Italo Calvino, If on a winter's night a traveler (1979; trans. William Weaver)

15. The sun shone, having no alternative, on the nothing new. —Samuel Beckett, Murphy (1938)

16. If you really want to hear about it, the first thing you'll probably want to know is where I was born, and what my lousy childhood was like, and how my parents were occupied and all before they had me, and all that David Copperfield kind of crap, but I don't feel like going into it, if you want to know the truth. —J. D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye (1951)

17. Once upon a time and a very good time it was there was a moocow coming down along the road and this moocow that was coming down along the road met a nicens little boy named baby tuckoo. —James Joyce, A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man (1916)

18. This is the saddest story I have ever heard. —Ford Madox Ford, The Good Soldier (1915)

19. I wish either my father or my mother, or indeed both of them, as they were in duty both equally bound to it, had minded what they were about when they begot me; had they duly considered how much depended upon what they were then doing;—that not only the production of a rational Being was concerned in it, but that possibly the happy formation and temperature of his body, perhaps his genius and the very cast of his mind;—and, for aught they knew to the contrary, even the fortunes of his whole house might take their turn from the humours and dispositions which were then uppermost:—Had they duly weighed and considered all this, and proceeded accordingly,—I am verily persuaded I should have made a quite different figure in the world, from that, in which the reader is likely to see me. —Laurence Sterne, Tristram Shandy (1759–1767)

20. Whether I shall turn out to be the hero of my own life, or whether that station will be held by anybody else, these pages must show. —Charles Dickens, David Copperfield (1850)

21. Stately, plump Buck Mulligan came from the stairhead, bearing a bowl of lather on which a mirror and a razor lay crossed. —James Joyce, Ulysses (1922)

22. It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents, except at occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the house-tops, and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the lamps that struggled against the darkness. —Edward George Bulwer-Lytton, Paul Clifford (1830)

23. One summer afternoon Mrs. Oedipa Maas came home from a Tupperware party whose hostess had put perhaps too much kirsch in the fondue to find that she, Oedipa, had been named executor, or she supposed executrix, of the estate of one Pierce Inverarity, a California real estate mogul who had once lost two million dollars in his spare time but still had assets numerous and tangled enough to make the job of sorting it all out more than honorary. —Thomas Pynchon, The Crying of Lot 49 (1966)

24. It was a wrong number that started it, the telephone ringing three times in the dead of night, and the voice on the other end asking for someone he was not. —Paul Auster, City of Glass (1985)

25. Through the fence, between the curling flower spaces, I could see them hitting. —William Faulkner, The Sound and the Fury (1929)

26. 124 was spiteful. —Toni Morrison, Beloved (1987)

27. Somewhere in la Mancha, in a place whose name I do not care to remember, a gentleman lived not long ago, one of those who has a lance and ancient shield on a shelf and keeps a skinny nag and a greyhound for racing. —Miguel de Cervantes, Don Quixote (1605; trans. Edith Grossman)

28. Mother died today. —Albert Camus, The Stranger (1942; trans. Stuart Gilbert)

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