Conversational insults

Any similarity between you and a human is purely
coincidental!

Are you always so stupid or is today a special
occasion?

As an outsider, what do you think of the human race?

I'd like to kick you in the teeth, but why should I
improve your looks?

At least there'e one thing good about your body.It
isn't as ugly as your face!

Brains aren't everything. In fact, in your case
they're nothing

Careful now, don't let your brains go to your head!

I like you. People say I've no taste, but I like
you.

Did your parents ever ask you to run away from home?

If I had a face like yours. I'd sue my parents!

Don't feel bad. A lot of people have no talent!

Don't get insulted, but is your job devoted to
spreading ignorance?

Keep talking, someday you'll say something
intelligent!

Don't think, it may sprain your brain!

Fellows like you don't grow from trees; they swing
from them.

He has a mechanical mind. Too bad he forgot to
wind it up this morning.

He has a mind like a steel trap -- always closed!

He is known as a miracle comic. if he's funny,
it's a miracle!

He is listed in Who's Who as What's That?

He is living proof that man can live without a
brain!

He is so short, when it rains he is always the
last one to know.

He is the kind of a man that you would use as a
blueprint to build an idiot.

How come you're here? I thought the zoo is closed
at night!

How did you get here? Did someone leave your cage
open?

How much refund do you expect on your head now
that it's empty.

Hi! I'm a human being! What are you?

I can't talk to you right now; tell me,where will
you be in the next 10 years?

I don't want you to turn the other cheek; it's
just as ugly.

I don't know who you are, but whatever you are,
I'm sure everyone will agree with me.

I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it
really works.

I could make a monkey out of you, but why should I
take all the credit?

I can't seem to remember your name, and please
don't help me!

I don't even like the people you're trying to
imitate, if you are at all.

I know you were born silly, but why did you have a
relapse?

I know you're not as stupid as you look. Nobody
could be!

I've seen people like you, but I had to pay
admission!